Good-bye Dubai (And Abu Dhabi!)

The last month in UAE was a whirlwind for us.  We landed in Dubai after our Italian adventure on 11-Aug, and I returned to work the following Sunday.

Last set of photos from our dear friend, Jo!

We divided our packing into 3 phases - Phase 1 was things to go into our air shipment (50 cubic feet) that would (hopefully) arrive at my father's home in Spring before we got home.  Key thing in this shipment was the double stroller.  We also packed some dress clothes, shoes, and baby stuff that we either had multiples of, or we could live without for a month, to help make transitioning to Houston easier. We were fortunate enough that our friends were going on holiday the week that I returned to work, so we borrowed their nanny for the week so that G could finish the inventory for our move, and sort out what was going into this early shipment.  Phase 1 completed on August 25.

Miss J and Miss J, out with the kids!

Phase 2 was everything we needed for 10 days of interim living plus what we would take on the airplane.  Since my company pays for business class for ALL members of the family (including Baby H!) we were entitled to 8 pieces of luggage and a free baby item (carseat or stroller).  After the carseat, stroller, and pack'n' play, we were left with 6 suitcases and 6 boxes - I think we packed more stuff into Phase 2 than we did into Phase 1, amazingly enough!  We also ended up throwing away a lot of things that came to interim living with us - a lot of medicines that we didn't want to bring, or odds and ends that we ran out of room for.  Phase 2 completed on September 6.

Phase 3 was everything else.  The full sea shipment - which would take 8-10 weeks to arrive in Houston, once it left Dubai.  It's currently scheduled to arrive in port of Houston on November 8, so hopefully it will be at our house the week of November 18. Phase 3 in progress, but the packing was finished September 9.

Our apartment...a sea of boxes...

In the midst of all this chaos, we had some big milestones as well!  L turned 2 - officially a big kid now! We had a pretty low-key family celebration where we took her to a breakfast & indoor play area on her actual birthday, then we had a big joint party with a family that we are close with a few weeks later.

This was the treat that L picked from a variety of pastries - a yummy chocolate covered almond biscuit

Celebrating 2 baby (I mean big kid..) birthdays!  

We also took a trip to Abu Dhabi and stayed in our old apartment building.  Our actual apartment wasn't available, but they did set us up in a nice apartment with the similar layout (it was mirrored from our apartment, which threw me off at times!). We were able to say introduce Baby H to our dearest friend Thuzar, who also happened to be Baby L's first friend.  We took one last spin around the Etihad Towers Observation Deck, went to St Andrew's Church, and reminisced about all the things we loved (and hated) about living in Abu Dhabi.  I cried a few times.  G smilesd and tried not to laugh while I cried.  It was therapeutic.

Baby H, also fast friends with Thuzar!

Thuzar, taking a few minutes from her very busy day to spend time with us

L, checking out the views!

One last trip to St Andrews Church

L & Baby H, cuddling on the sofa where I spent days and days cuddling Baby L

Baby H also turned 4 months old...and had to get her 4-month shots.  It went much better than the 2-month shots, thank goodness! We were in interim living at our hotel apartment by then without any swings or jumpers to entertain her, so we were thankful that the jabs went well.

Happy 4-month old Baby H!

We spent a ton of time saying goodbye to friends and colleagues. It was different from most goodbyes from our past because we truly aren't sure when we'll see a lot of these friends again - though hopefully not too far into the future.  There will always be an extra bed in our home for anyone who wants to visit Houston!

Miss Shelly had a special sing, laugh, and messy play class dedicated to all of L's favorite things

L actually hugged her friend good-bye! (She rarely hugs anyone)

Photo op with friends from Texas who happened to be living in Dubai at the same time as us!

It took pretty much a whole year of visits for L to warm up to this guy (one of my co-workers who became instant besties with G), but it FINALLY happened!

My AMAZING personal trainer, bouncing Baby H on her knee

L and Jo match!  We're a blue and yellow sandwich!

Miss J and the girls in Abu Dhabi

My office going away lunch at the lovely Mitts and Trays out on Blue Waters Island

I have so many more going-away photos, but I'll end with this one, another of my favorites from our dear friend Jo.  

Good-bye Dubai!  See you next time!

Big News!

It's been a little quiet on the Dubai front with L and H because our family has a TON of big news that we can finally share!

Baby H says, "We have something BIG to tell you!"

1.  My amazing sister has accepted a position as assistant professor at STANFORD UNIVERSITY Department of Chemical Engineering!  We're so thrilled for her and her husband, and I'm so proud to call her my sister.

Professor Auntie holding Baby L

2. My father is moving to Houston!  The he bought in Spring (just north of Houston proper) is 40 minutes from the house we own, and about 20 minutes from my company's main office.

So excited for Dad's retirement and move to TEXAS!!!

3. And finally - We are moving home!  I was offered (and accepted) a position in HR as a staffing advisor for projects, which is actually a dream job for me.  I used to say my job in Baytown was probably going to be the funnest job I'd ever had (is funnest even a word? Well, it is now!) but this job might be even more fun!  My job will literally be to talk to people about their jobs and help match them to the right next job. How cool is that? 

Baby H says "See? I told you it was BIG!"

There is a hugely sad part for us to leaving a year earlier than we planned.  Miss J, our live-in nanny, can't come with us.  If I could legally bring her with us, I would, but our options are very limited since she is a Filipina.  At best, I think I could bring her on a temporary work visa for a year or two, but then it would be very difficult for her to return to UAE, so it is with a heavy heart (and a lot of tears from L, Miss J, and me!) that we are working on finding her a new family that is hopefully as awesome as we are.  Silver lining is that if we end up moving to Vietnam (like we hope to one day), she can easily visit us there during her annual leave.  We are heartbroken since she has become a part of our family - she's so much more than just a helper and nanny.  She is a second mother to my girls, and she has taught me so much about parenting. I'm still struggling to imagine what our lives will be like without seeing her cheerful smile every morning. Especially since we hadn't planned on moving home for another year, I thought I'd have more time to mentally prepare myself.😢😢😢

Miss J snuggling Baby H

And Miss J with Baby L 18 months ago!

H and L will also have this in common - both were born overseas, and neither of them will remember where we were living when they were born.  H will be slightly older than L when we moved from Abu Dhabi to Dubai, but not by much! On the one hand, my friend reminded me that's it's good to be wanted by the company. On the other hand, it is slightly irritating that I have to have the anxiety and stress of moving during both of my maternity leaves.

Soaking up what's left of my maternity leave with my girls before the chaos of moving starts! 

We're also sad to be leaving our friends in Dubai. I remember during my maternity leave in Abu Dhabi, I felt pretty isolated because I knew I was leaving long before I delivered L -- so I didn't make much effort to make friends during our short time there. In Dubai, we settled in, made some really great friends, and will be very sad to leave them.

Enough about the bad parts of moving - we are so excited to be closer to the rest of our family (Miss J notwithstanding). With Dad moving to Houston, L & H will have both sets of grandparents and one set of aunties and uncles nearby to love on them. Plus the other auntie and uncle are only a short flight away in the Bay Area.

We're excited for cooler weather. And easily accessible pork. And easily accessible alcohol. And one-stop grocery shopping. And COSTCO!!!

We're excited to be in our own home again - our apartment has a phenomenal view of the Dubai Marina, but there is construction of a new building that will obstruct our view by the middle of next year. Plus we have AMAZING neighbors in Houston, so it will be wonderful to see them again and introduce them to our girls.

As all my friends and family know, change is really hard for me -- I like living in the bubble of uncertainty because uncertainty is like a world of possibility. Thankfully, I married a man who hates uncertainty, but can weather change like a champ -- and he has put up with my daily swings of excitement to go home and crying because we're leaving. G is my rock, and he is SUPER thrilled to go home!

There is so much that needs to happen between now and the big move (including a summer vacation to Italy!) and we will continue to share our journey back home!

Baby Story: Baby H's Time in the Hospital

Our newest little nugget!

I'm not going to lie, our first night with Baby H was rough.  Unlike BrightPoint. Royal Women's Hospital in Abu Dhabi (recently renamed NMC Royal Women's Hospital), Mediclinic policy is that babies 100% "Room-In" with the mothers. The hospital doesn't even have a nursery for babies to go to - unless the baby is in the NICU, it is in the room with the mother.

According to the World Health Organization, "Rooming-In" is better for the babies, and supposedly better for the mothers - I strongly disagree with the second part of that statement.  When  I gave birth to Baby L, I lost over a liter of blood, my hemoglobin was below 5g/DL, and what I needed more than anything was uninterrupted rest.  So the nurses at BrightPoint took my baby to the nursery for 2 hours until she needed to eat so I could sleep.

Fortunately, with Baby H, I still lost a liter of blood, but I had boosted my iron ahead of time, so my hemoglobin was around 7.5 g/DL. I was also in labor a lot less time, so even though the labor was harder, I was "less tired" - but I still could have used some uninterrupted sleep, which Baby H was not having at all.  She fussed all night, to the point where I had to start "tuning her out" because she wasn't hungry, her diaper wasn't poopy, she was just making fussing sounds because she didn't like being out of the womb (sorry, kid).  Between that and the nurses coming in and out to take our vital signs all night, I got maybe 3 or 4 hours of sleep in the wee hours of the morning.  I'm pretty sure that this is how post-partum depression starts, by sleep-depriving a new mother immediately after giving birth to her child.  I'll come back to this later, but I'll hop off rant for now.

After our rough night where neither of us got much sleep (G reports that the pull out sofa bed was extraordinarily uncomfortable), G went home to pick up Baby L and Miss J and bring them to the hospital to meet Baby H.

Baby L is a little apprehensive of Baby H. We're sure she'll get over it, it's just going to take some time.

I mentioned in my post about the induced labor that we weren't able to have a birth story photographer because the hospital policy is only one extra person in the delivery room.  This also worked out pretty well because Jo, my new favorite photographer in UAE had also just had a baby almost 3 weeks prior to ours, so a 4-5 hour birth story would have been tough for me to ask her to do.  Instead, I asked her to come do a fresh 48 the morning after delivery, and I'm so glad I did because the photos she took were beautiful!  She also took some great shots of the whole family on the hospital bed, something I forgot to do with Baby L because of all the trauma of both my blood loss during her delivery and her treatments for possible infection. This is not yet the full gallery, but
she sent me a sneak peak so I could share with friends and family.  I just love the way that Jo captures naturally happy moments in our family - even when she poses us, it doesn't feel horribly staged, we're just having good time being ourselves.

Our beautiful Baby H, bright eyed and bushy tailed even though Mommy was exhausted

Making  sure Baby L still gets some love from Mommy!

First family photo

I think Baby L was actually playing peek-a-boo with Jo and her camera!

Super Dad with his new baby girl

Jo stayed with us for a few hours and it was also fun to catch up with her about her birth experience and how things were going with her newborn as well.

After Jo left, we got the bad news that Baby H's blood type came back, and she had ABO incompatibility jaundice.  Essentially, she inherited G's blood type which was incompatible with my blood type, and my immune system created antibodies that would break down Baby H's red blood cells faster than her liver could process.  This is apparently very, very common, and the most typical treatment for newborn jaundice is light therapy, so Baby H was going to have to spend 24 hours in this special light box, with only breaks for feeding and diaper changes - I was crushed because it meant I would only have very limited cuddles with my little one.

Baby H in her light box

Let me tell you, 24 hours in the light box for a new mom and baby is hard.  My milk hadn't come in yet, and Baby H was HUNGRY. With jaundice, it is really important that the baby eat to help clear out the bilirubin in her system (the toxin from the breakdown of red blood cells that causes the yellowing of eyes and skin for jaundice).  G took Baby L and Miss J home, then came back to spend the afternoon with the baby and me so I could get some more sleep - we decided that he would not spend the night since there wasn't much he could do other than suffer on the mattress. He'd be more helpful to me with a good night's rest.

It was a struggle from the start - Baby H wanted to eat all. the. time. And getting her to settle back down on the table without crying was really difficult. By around 10pm, I finally had my first crying breakdown, and I called the nurses to help me with the babe - the nurse took the baby from me, telling me to calm down since my being upset would also make the baby upset.  She advised that formula might help her sleep, and reassured me that all babies struggle with phototherapy.  Intellectually, I knew this was the right answer - I had even just listened to a podcast and posted a NY Times Article on Facebook from economist Emily Oster that discussed this very thing, that there is no conclusive data that formula is bad for your baby or that "nipple confusion" is actually a real thing.  Emotionally, it was hard to say yes - Baby L had 100% breastmilk until she was 6 months old, and I wanted to the same for Baby H - but I also really really wanted to sleep, so I signed the formula consent, and the nurse fed the baby and put her down.  And I got 3 glorious hours of sleep.

At 2am, Baby H woke up and I changed her diaper...and after an hour of unsuccessfully trying to put her down, I called the nurses again.  More formula, and they settled her, and I got 3 more hours of much sleep.  It was amazing.  The nurses were somewhat shocked at how much Baby H could eat -she finished all 60 mls of formula both times, and that was after draining the colostrum in both my breasts. She was a big baby! And at this point I realized, that "rooming-in" doesn't mean you have to go it alone as a new mom - it just means you need to ask for help.  I still don't like the 100% rooming-in policy because I don't think most moms KNOW that you can ask for help - so I wish that new moms were told after being wheeled to the maternity ward postpartum to call for help.  Not just that the call button is on the hospital bed, but please use it and actually call for help.

The next morning, we got Baby H's initial results at 10am.  We could take her off the light table, but we had to wait until 4pm to confirm her bilirubin levels wouldn't rebound.  So I finally got the cuddles I was hoping for, and we hung out and took some passport photos.  This one was my favorite, but the passport photo people said we should probably use one of the more neutral-looking ones.

Baby H, looking super duper Asian

The nurses took Baby H's blood in the afternoon, and the doc came back with the results - they were just barely in the acceptable range, so she recommended we stay another night.  At this point, I really, really wanted to go home, so the doc scheduled us to return the next day, and warned us that we might be due for a second round of photo therapy if Baby H rebounded.  The hospital had promised discharge would go quickly, but it still took forever - we didn't get home until around 8pm, and we had an appointment at noon the next day with the pediatrician.  Had I known discharge would still take that long despite the doctor's promises, I would have stayed the extra night, but hindsight is 20/20.

Baby H ready for her first car ride!

It was, indeed, amazing to sleep in my own bed again.   But alas, as I'm sure you can from above, we ended up back in the hospital for another round of photo therapy, from 3pm until 11am the next day.  Her skin had yellowed, and her bilirubin levels were just into the therapeutic range.  She was only 3 days old,  bilirubin levels peak around day 5-7, so while the doc was on the fence about re-admitting her, and I told him I wanted to do it just to be sure. Day 2 was even harder, because now Baby H knew when the eye protection went on, she would be on the light table.  And unfortunately, my night nurse this time around was not has helpful as the previous nurses - she was unwilling to feed the baby for me, or really even hold the baby to help me settle her, she just sort of stood next to me watching me and advising me to try things that I had already shown her didn't work.  I finally asked her to just leave. I was on my own - but at least this time around I had the tools (and the previous good night's sleep) to help me get through the night.

Round 2 of phototherapy

Even after the nurses took Baby L's blood for testing, I kept her on the light table as much as I could just to be sure. Her levels were back down, and we would be discharged in a few hours once things were sorted out with billing. We were scheduled to return in 1 week for a check-up - So Baby H will have that in common with Baby L, both of them spent their first 5 days of life in the hospital for some sort of treatment!

We got all packed up, and I came home to deliveries from my wonderful co-workers of flowers, more flowers, and chocolates! More on our first days at home in our next post!

Early Adventures of Baby L: Ajman

Last month, I had one more week of parental leave to use up so we opted to stay local to UAE and visit the one Emirate that we haven't at least driven through: Ajman. Ajman is the smallest Emirate at only 100 sq miles and population of ~250k. G booked 2 nights for all of us at the beautiful Fairmont Ajman, and we had a lovely little beach staycation.

The view from our balcony - pretty swanky

 We tried to take Baby L to the ocean after success in Galveston, but alas, we think the seaweed scared her.  Fortunately, unlike the attempt in Fujairah, she happily splashed in the pool after crying in the ocean.

I'm not so sure about this sand, Mommy!

G and I got some much needed R&R at the spa, and Baby L got to explore the kiddie area with Miss J. I think both of them found it was much more fun to just run around in the hallway outside our rooms. The hallway was fully carpeted and hotel occupancy was super low since we came in the middle of the week during low season, so the two of them pretty much had the area to themselves.

Baby L learning to grocery shop....

...and then taking over the hallway of our hotel

 I think the best part of Ajman for me was that my work laptop would not connect to the hotel wifi. All of our phones and tablets would connect, but my work laptop absolutely refused - we had some critical things going on at the office, but it was like a message from the powers that be that I needed a little break! I managed well enough with my iPhone and then logged in when we got back to Dubai.

Now all of us can say that we've been to all seven of the United Arab Emirates! Whew, can finally check that one off the list. Next stop, Boston, Connecticut, and Maine for Baby L's first birthday!

Pumping Mommy: Basra Edition

I work in oil and gas - I try to avoid posting who my employer is on FB and IG for privacy reasons. My close friends all know who I work for, and anyone who wants to snoop can figure it out via LinkedIn. Anyway - my work assignment in Dubai is supporting projects in Iraq. When I took the assignment, I knew it included travel to Basra on an "as-needed" basis - to develop relationships with Iraqis that I work with, see the construction site, and backfill for my supervisor; maybe a once or twice per-quarter sort of thing. We found out we were pregnant two weeks after I accepted, and when I disclosed my pregnancy to my supervisor, he and the occupational health team decided to cancel my travel and keep me fully in Dubai.

Now that Baby L is a little older, we've established a great relationship with Miss J, and I've read dozens of articles on pumping while travelling, I felt ready to travel. I will note a list of the most helpful resources at the end of the post.

Travel in and around Basra requires quite a bit of security - so pumping on the go is not an option!

Questions that I needed answered before going!

1. Where can I store my milk while in Basra?
2. Where do I pump at the office in Basra?
3. What do I need to bring my milk home?
4. What is the itinerary for travelling in and out of country, and where are the best places to pump?

1 through 3 were pretty easy. My room at the camp had a ~4 cu. ft fridge with one of those little built-in freezer compartments, so I was able to store milk there. I laid the milk bags flat against the metal since that is the actual freezing element, and then once frozen I stored them vertically for more space.

All those happy little milk bags standing upright, and one little milk bag in front on its way to frozen happiness. Plus a chocolate bar for mommy. Because in Basra, mommy NEEDS chocolate!

The fridge also made a really great cleaning station for all my pump parts. Iraq is a dry country, so we are instructed not to carry in any alcohol products - and this includes hand sanitizers or alcohol wipes. Medela makes alcohol-free disinfecting wipes, which is perfect since I didn't want to wash my pump parts in the local water and I didn't have a microwave or electric kettle to heat up bottled water.

My tidy little pump parts cleaning station. Sometimes I wondered what the all-male housekeeping staff thought of me!

At the office, I found the ladies prayer room, and did my business there. It was private, much nicer than using the toilet area, and the ladies there were excited to see photos of my daughter. I think pumping is not a "thing" in Iraq, so they all thought I was little strange, but they seemed pretty accepting of what I was trying to accomplish.

At camp was easy. I just pumped in my room. Done.

If I were living in and taking a business trip in North America, I would have used a shipping service like Milk Stork to get my milk home, but that's a bit harder when crossing international lines, especially in the Middle East - so I was going to have to carry it in my checked luggage. To bring my milk home, I purchased a Pack-It lunchbox which is lined with freezable gel, and cooler-shock freezer packs.  I didn't know for sure that the refrigerator in my room actually worked, so I had planned to ask the camp boss to use the main kitchen freezer. I had fully prepared myself to have the awkward conversation about what was actually IN the lunchbox. Fortunately, since the mini freezer worked, I just sent my empty lunchbox and cooler packs to the kitchen freezer. Again, the all-male staff looked at me like I was strange, but didn't ask any questions.

Pack-It Brand lunch box and Cooler Shock Ice Pack

I also used zip-top bags instead of my normal Kiinde bags. The Kiinde bags are great, but they take up more room because of the twist cap. Since I was already lugging around my pump and all these cooler packs, I wanted to try to use as little space as possible, so the more traditional zip-top bag was the better option. They also allowed the milk to freezer faster since they lay flat and have more contact area with the freezer. I used Lanisoh because they were the cheapest in UAE, but Medela or any other zip-top brand would have been fine. My 16 bags of milk BARELY fit into the cooler with 2 icepacks, so I may need to come up with a different plan in the future if I'll be gone for more than 3 nights. Or maybe the extra frozen milk will keep everything cold enough that I can get away with just 1 ice pack. We'll see!

I brought 3 cooler packs with me, for a 3-night stay I only needed 2. For a 4-night stay, I'd probably only need 1.

The last question was the hardest. When can I pump while in transit? On the way in to Basra, the itinerary looks like this (note BAS is 1 hour behind UAE)

0545 UAE - arrive at airport

0715 UAE - board plane

0755 UAE - depart Dubai, 2 hour flight

0900 BAS - land, go to immigration for visa

1030 BAS - depart airport

1200 BAS - arrive at office

So the two primary places to pump were either at the airport or on the plane. Since I nursed Baby L just before leaving, I opted to pump on the plane. I dumped the 6 ounces that I pumped on the airplane so I wouldn't have any issues at the security checkpoints at the airport - in retrospect, I probably could have kept it.

On the way back to UAE, it was a little trickier, and the airplane was still the best option. There is a ladies prayer room at the airport, however there was no guarantee that there will be time to use it - between the office and the airport, we have to change vehicles once, and then we have 2 checkpoints that involve getting out of the vehicle, putting your bags through an x-ray, and getting patted down (for me in a private ladies area). Once at the airport, there are 2 more security checkpoints, one before and one after flight check-in. I knew once I landed in Dubai, I wouldn't want to stop and pump, I'd just wanted to get home, so I planned to pump on the plane.

1330 BAS - leave office for airport

1430 BAS - arrive airport

1545 BAS - board plane

1625 BAS - depart Basra, 2 hour flight

1915 UAE - arrive Dubai, go through immigration & customs

2030 UAE - arrive home

I had a little complication with my passport on the day we left - obtaining my exit visa took longer than expected, so I didn't get my passport back until 14:00, so the main transport group left without me so the other 10 people on the flight wouldn't be delayed because of me. Our logistics team arranged a private transport for me, but I still had to do all the security checkpoints. Plus I had to explain what my pump was at every check point. It involved a lot of pictures of my baby, pointing at my boobs and saying "milk". As soon as the male security guards figured it out, they looked incredibly embarrassed and let me through! If I wasn't in such a rush, I would have been more entertained by the whole situation.  Either way, I was glad I planned to pump on the plane.

Airplane pumping is definitely not glamorous. For such a short flight, as soon as the seatbelt sign is off, I run to the lavatory and set the pump on top of the toilet seat, and stand facing the pump (and the toilet) while I let the pump run. It only takes me about 15 minutes total, including setup and breakdown, but on an airplane, it's a long time to be in the lavatory! Plus, if it's a little bumpy, I basically get jostled around the grossest part of the plane. Baby L is old enough that I didn't worry to much about the germs, but it still grosses me out a little.

I also couldn't keep a very regimented schedule while away - I pumped when I could slip away from meetings or when I was very full and couldn't wait anymore. I'm very fortunate in that I have a pretty high storage capacity, so as long as I pumped until I was empty, I didn't see much drop in production - I brought home almost as much as Baby L consumed while I was away. The downside of my awesome milk production is that I had to wake up in the middle of the night to pump because I was super engorged and couldn't get back to sleep - so my hopes for full nights of rest while away were somewhat dashed.

Was it worth the extra bag for my pump, plus increasing my luggage requirements by 30% and all the extra anxiety? Not sure - if I didn't know that she hated formula so much, I probably would have just pumped and dumped. It would have saved a lot of hassle, as well as reduced my luggage by one bag. Either way, I'm glad that I did it, and similar to the author of my favorite book on this subject, I'll never question my ability to provide for my child!

Resources!

• Work. Pump. Repeat. by Jessica Shortall - a great book for working, pumping moms. It made me laugh and cry as I read it before going back to work. I went back to this book for tips just before I made the trip to Basra.
• Pumping on a Business Trip - from Moms in Tech Blog
• Shipping & Travelling with Milk - from Breastfeeding in Combat Boots Blog - the guide for packaging frozen breastmilk was my backup plan if my special lunch box and cooler packs hadn't arrived in time. Still a great resource.
• Milk Stork - for pumping moms in North America, this looks like an AWESOME SERVICE - unfortunately, they don't ship to Iraq 😀. I signed up for a beta to have them ship me a storage kit in Dubai, but haven't heard anything from them yet.
• Ladies I work with - I asked lots of questions of other women who travelled in an out of Basra for my company. They gave me tons of suggestions and advice for which I am so grateful!
• My supervisor. He was very supportive, he made what I thought would be very awkward conversations totally NOT awkward, and he let me expense my special lunch box and cooler packs (because I wouldn't have needed them if I wasn't travelling!!!).