Saturday, December 30, 2017

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

We celebrated Baby L's first Christmas! She let us sleep in until 7:30am, and while she was still a little fussy from her vaccination shots, she let us dress her up in cute Christmas outfits.
The best family Christmas photo!
Baby L's all-day Christmas onesie
Baby L with Miss J in her church outfit that Mimi and Granddad sent to us
We went to morning church service at Christ Church in Jebel Ali, the Anglican Church we've been attending since we moved to Dubai. Miss J came with us for the first time, and we enjoyed a nice kids-focused service. I wore a sweater and jeans, and I wished I had worn a traditional Vietnamese ao dai for the service - it didn't even occur to me until we got to the church and I saw a lot of the Indian women wearing their beautiful saris! I might start wearing my ao dais to church on Fridays just so I have an excuse to wear them - they've been sitting in my closet since I had them made in Vietnam with little occasion for me to wear them. I did change into my red one when I got home for our family photos.
Baby L and I in my ao dai
 After pictures, I cooked for the first time in months! I made roast small chickens (because we couldn't find cornish hens), green beans, and mashed potatoes with gravy - a pretty traditional American meal. I would have roasted a turkey, but I didn't want the hassle (or the long cook time!), and for three people, the chickens were more than enough.

Since Baby L doesn't know enough to want to open presents first thing in the morning, we waited until after her afternoon nap. She was cheerful, squealing, and she helped me rip the paper off some of her gifts! All in all, it was fun filled day, though we wish we could have been with family.

We wish everyone a happy 2018! Look for more adventures of Baby L as we get ready for a big trip to Singapore and Vietnam early in the new year!!

Saturday, December 23, 2017

Baby L is 4 months old! And that means shots. :-(

Baby L turned 4 months old yesterday, and to celebrate, we had gourmet donuts from Dum Dum Donutterie - an oreo cream filled donut for G, a nutella donut for Miss J, and a salted caramel donut for me (plus a sprinkles donut for Baby L).

She got her little hands on her donut and flung the sprinkles everywhere!
Grinning after her sprinkle-flinging handiwork
This little peanut is now double her birth weight, rolling over, and starting to teeth! She was kind of in an odd mood all day - we managed to get her to smile for her photographs, but she was generally subdued and a little fussy all day. We suspect the teething is making her uncomfortable. In conjunction with some epic Dubai fog casting weird diffused light into our apartment, it made for a strange day.

Photo of the fog rolling in, taken by G from our balcony. By mid-afternoon, it was a total white-out, and we couldn't see anything!
Today, she woke up happy and excited, more like her usual self, which was an extra bummer since we had to go get shots today. We want to make sure she has a full week between her shots and our long airplane trip to Vietnam, so we decided to do them right after her birthday, even it meant her being a little extra fussy for her first Christmas.
All smiles and giggles as the doctor's office!
Baby L passed her 4 month checkup with flying colors, with only the recommendation for more tummy time - since she rolled back to front before going front to back, the doc says she needs to work on her back muscles. Otherwise, this chunky monkey has gone from 40th percentile for weight vs height to 70th percentile -- all on mommy's breastmilk! We just love her little michelan man fat rolls!

I wanted Baby L to have a better experience with her shots than last time - last time she cried hysterically for about 5 minutes, and G had to take her away so I could listen to what the doctor was telling me. This time, after reading some articles on the 5 S' (swaddle, shush, side, suck, swing), I swaddled Baby L's arms tightly right before her shots, scooped her up afterwards and shushed and rocked her, and it worked! She calmed down in less than a minute (though it was a very teary minute!). I took a few laps around the waiting room while G paid the insurance co-pay, and we were able to get her in the carseat and home with minimal fuss. Miss J looked so upset, and when I asked her, she said she was just said that Baby L had to hurt - so that made me feel better than the woman with 5 kids and 2 grandkids still gets sad when a baby has to have shots.

Tomorrow, we're excited for Baby L's first Christmas!  More photos to come!!

Tuesday, December 19, 2017

My First Birthday Abroad!

Thanks to everyone for the wonderful birthday wishes! It's now a little after 8pm as I write this, and it has been an almost perfect birthday. This post will be short and sweet! It started with some family cuddle time in bed since Baby L let us sleep in a little later than usual. G had roses for me and cooked a hearty American-style breakfast of biscuits, sausage, bacon, and eggs.  After breakfast, Baby L and I had some playtime on the sofa will G and Miss J cleaned up breakfast - and I got this adorable photo of her!
My sweet Santa-baby! Look at that grin!!!
Then G took me out for lunch (Miss J stayed home with Baby L) at Din Tai Fung, one of my favorite places to eat. I'm normally not a huge fan of restaurant chains, and DTF is the exception to my rule! We ordered a bunch of food, and it was all in our bellies before I even thought to take pictures. 

After lunch, we caught an early showing of the new Star Wars movie - it was great, though a bit long when accounting for the 30 minutes of commercials before the previews even started. I had a classic comedy movie moment - I forgot to bring a hand pump for breastmilk with me, so I ended up with a wet spot on the front of my shirt. Fortunately, I had a sweatshirt with me for the chilly movie theater, so I was able to "cover up" on the metro ride home!

We came home to Miss J having tummy time with Baby L - she has learned to roll over! Watch out world, soon we will have a crawling rugrat!

Baby L is finally ok with tummy time! Soon we're going to need some baby gates!
We ordered Vietnamese delivery for dinner, and a pair of cupcakes from Magnolia Bakery are on their way to our home right now! I don't think I could have asked for a better day - it was easy, laid back, and full of love and good food!

Wednesday, December 6, 2017

Early Adventures of Baby L - Long Weekend in Dubai!


Last week, we had an epic 5-day weekend in Dubai - Thursday thru Monday. We were celebrating UAE National Day, Martyr's Day, and the birth of the Prophet Mohammed all at once! We had grand plans to finish unpacking the house, and unfortunately, G came down with a allergy-induced cold. He'd been congested from all the dust in Dubai, and the post-nasal drainage he had at night caused a sore throat. Like champ, he powered through and we still got some important things done - like buying a Christmas tree.  We considered buying a real tree through either Ace Hardware or Bloombox, but at the end of the day, it was just easier to buy a fake one from Ikea (G's first fake one...maybe ever. Poor guy.) G didn't ship any of our Christmas stuff from Houston since we had no idea what kind of storage space we might or might not have, so we also needed all new ornaments. Enter Ikea and their National Day Sale - 50% off everything Christmas, including the tree! Yay!
Baby L's first Christmas tree!
G and I went to Ikea early Thursday morning to try to beat out the crowds - no such luck. Where Ikea in Abu Dhabi is pretty quiet in the morning, Ikea in Dubai is ALWAYS crazy busy. When G and I got home, we all pitched in to help decorate the tree, including Miss J! Baby L was not super enthusiastic because all 3 of her adults were distracted by the Christmas Spirit - meaning we weren't paying attention to her.  It's tough being a baby!

Miss J spent the rest of the weekend in Abu Dhabi packing up her belongings at her previous employer's home so she could fully move in with us! We were sad she was away and also super excited to know that she was coming to be with us permanently.

We took Baby L to Christ Church in Jebel Ali, which is just outside Dubai (and about 15 minutes from our apartment. We got there SUPER early because we weren't sure about the parking situation, and I think next time, we'll leave a little later. We really enjoyed the service, and we plan to try to come back every week!
Baby L's first trip to church in Dubai!
We also took Baby L on her first metro ride with some moderate success. Ibn Battuta Mall is 2 metro stops from our place, and my coworkers told me it's much less crowded than Dubai Mall or Mall of the Emirates. Basically Dubai Mall and Mall of the Emirates are for tourists, and Ibn Battuta Mall - while still very, very, nice - is more for expats and locals. I needed to send a gift via DHL to a friend back home, and we wanted to check out the grocery store since it might be easier to get to this mall than some of the others.

Baby L had her #grumpybaby face on the whole time. She was all cute and cheerful as we left the apartment, and then I think she was angry that she couldn't see what was going on from the stroller. I tried holding her face-out like Miss J does for awhile, and eventually put her into the Ergobaby (thank goodness we brought it with us!)
Cute to start...
Then #grumpybaby on the metro...
#Grumpybaby while waiting on Mommy at DHL...
And #grumpybaby in the Ergobaby on the way back home.
On Monday, G went to pick up Miss J from Abu Dhabi with all of her belongings, and we spent the last day of our long weekend chilling around the house. I finished Baby L's nursery (with the exception of her dresser, which is still a useless pile of lumber until I get  the right parts), and I finished the master bedroom.
We bought some lovely pieces from a local artist, and this round plate I hung just outside Baby L's room. It says "Peace, Hope, and Love" in Arabic.
Bit by bit, our place is becoming home - my goal is to have everything done by the time we go to Vietnam in January so that we're ready for visitors when we get back!

Sunday, November 26, 2017

Counting our Blessings this Thanksgiving Holiday

We celebrated our first Thanksgiving overseas, and to be honest, it sort of snuck up on us. The combination of moving to Dubai, going back to work, and not seeing any Thanksgiving advertising made it easy to almost forget this traditional American holiday. Fortunately, Facebook and our families made sure we didn't forget!

I'm so thankful for my family. G is always so supportive of everything I do, and while Baby L can be a challenging (or as the host of our morning radio program here in UAE puts it, she is a "lifestyle inhibitor"), she brightens our life in ways we didn't know possible. I took the afternoon off work on Thanksgiving Day so I could spend some quality cuddles with this baby girl (and also so G and I could go buy some rugs for our apartment before weekend rush-hour traffic hit Dubai).
Hey, Mom! It's my 3-month birthday!!
I'm not so sure about this cupcake...or this flower thing on my head...
Ok, fine, I will smile with this thing on my head. :-)
This brings me to the second thing that I'm thankful for - our nanny, Miss J. Week 2 at work was with Miss J in our home, and it was much smoother than Week 1. G was able to study, do homework, and even get a few house projects done. Miss J is a Filipino national who raised 5 children of her own and has 2 grandkids - so she has definitely taught me a thing or two about caring for a baby! She is a huge blessing in our life, and we're so happy to have her as part of our family. Baby L is too!

Miss J with Baby L - seriously, does this woman look old enough to have grand kids!!! She is so amazing with endless energy, and we love having her in our home.
We celebrated Thanksgiving with other expats back in Abu Dhabi. This allowed us to do two things - one, obviously, have some turkey and classic Thanksgiving dishes and two, it allowed us to say one last goodbye to the housekeeping staff at our old apartment before we did our final walkthrough and turn-in of our keys. These are the next two things I'm thankful for - our expat family who help us celebrate traditions from home while we are away (thanks Jeanne, the food was amazing!!!), and the wonderful housekeeping staff who took care of us while we lived in Abu Dhabi.

Friday Thanksgiving at Jeanne's home was a bit chaotic - there were 5 families celebrating, 2 families with 4 kids each, 1 family with 3 kids, our family with 1 kiddo, and 1 younger couple that didn't have kids yet. 12 kids ranging in age from 3 months to 15 years was probably some awesome birth control for that couple! All joking aside, we had a good time and really enjoyed both the company and sharing the evening with other families. All the chaos was a little overwhelming for Baby L, so unfortunately, no photos - thankfully (see Thankful Item #2!) Miss J was able to keep Baby L calm so G and I could socialize a little bit! And since Jeanne was Miss J's previous employer, she was very familiar with the home and all the quieter places we could keep Baby L since she wasn't use to having so many kids rough and tumbling around her.

Saturday was a lot more laid back for Baby L and me. G and Miss J ran errands in Abu Dhabi so Baby L and I got a few hours of cuddles with just the two of us in our old apartment - it was so nostalgic for me. This apartment, for all its quirks that drove us crazy while we lived here, will always hold a special place in my heart. It's the home where I spent most of my pregnancy and all of my maternity leave, my baby's first home. I cried a few times, especially with Miss Thuzar from housekeeping came by to give Baby L and I hugs. I remember sitting in my rocking chair with Baby L the afternoon after Dad left, crying and trying not to look like I was crying, and Thuzar pretending not to notice I was crying but telling me to call her anytime if I needed something. Seeing her every day is one of the things I will miss most about living here. I'm so thankful that she came into our lives, and she will always be Baby L's first friend!
Baby L and I, napping on the sofa just like when she was a newborn!
After G and Miss J came home, we took a tourist walk around the hotel - from the stunning 74th floor observation deck to the sparkly ceiling at the ballroom level - it was a fun little way to take in everything one last time. After all, unless we stay here again as guests, we won't have access to it for free anymore!
Selfies at the ballroom ceiling! It is much more sparkly in person - it's hard to see all the crystals in the photo.
Sunday (today) we did our final check out walkthrough and say a true and final good-bye to life in Abu Dhabi for now. I'm thankful for all the wonderful memories we've made here, and I'm thankful for all the future memories we will make in our new home!

And of course - since it's the weekend of THE Game, Baby L has a message for everyone at home...

Go Blue!!!

Saturday, November 18, 2017

First Week At Work

My first week back to work went (for me) better than expected. I cried a lot on Saturday - partially because I was frustrated with how little I was able to unpack because I needed to look after Baby L, and partially because I wanted to savor every last moment with Baby L but was living amidst a sea of boxes.  It was a really tough weekend, between setting up the new home and dealing with separation anxiety.

Hard to say goodbye to this little peanut!
The home part of returning to work has been really hard. I hate leaving Baby L in the mornings when she is super cheerful. She had a hard time taking a bottle at the beginning of the week too, so when I came home, she was fussy and hungry and just wanted to eat and eat and eat and pass out. I considered flexing my time to come into the office later and stay later so I could enjoy happy time with the baby and be available for my supervisor. With her new eating routine, if I flexed later, she would go hungry all day and then keep me up all night trying to eat, so we'll be keeping on this schedule in the near term. The goal is for Baby L to eat about 12 ounces while I'm away, and at the beginning of the week it was only 5-6 ounces. By Thursday, she had 10-12 ounces - so we're getting there, slowly but surely! G has been a champ, very patiently feeding her even when it takes literally all day.
Baby L just wants to eat and sleep and eat some more from when I get home to bedtime.
The home part has been hard for G as well. She's been particularly needy since I've returned to work, so he hasn't been able to spend as much time as he'd like on unpacking or on his coursework. The good part of this bonding time he's had with her is that now she actively looks for him when she hears his voice - like she'll stop nursing to find him when he's talking to me. This is simultaneously annoying and sweet.

Each night, after Baby L went to bed, I tried to wrap up a few loose ends at work and then assemble a little piece of her nursery. The  most frustrating thing was her dresser/changing table. I was so excited to have a place to put her clothes and  burp cloths that wasn't cardboard boxes and suitcases - only to discover that the beautiful dresser I purchased didn't come with any of the right hardware!! I'm currently working with Graco/Storkcraft to get the hardware sent to UAE, and in the meantime, we're still using cardboard boxes. At least her crib and rocking chair (both also Graco/Storkcraft) came together without any issue.

Baby L's dresser is a useless pile of lumber until the hardware arrives. I'd go buy all the hardware myself, but I'm not sure I'd be able to find all the weird little bushings and cams here in UAE.
The work part of returning to work has been great. Everyone on my team has been so kind and seems to be genuinely happy to have me back. It feels good to have some professional stimulation. My supervisor has been accommodating and allowed me to flex my schedule so that I'm in the office from 7:30am to 4pm, and then I log back in at 7pm after Baby L is asleep. I know it's hard for him to allow me to make that change since he is located in Basra, so my "away" time is 3pm-6pm -- his prime productive time. So far, it seems to be ok.

Another bonus is that I can take the metro to work every morning, and it's just as fast and half the  price of taking a taxi. And I can't beat the view of Dubai from my office - I can even see our apartment building, though our actual apartment is on the side facing away  from my office, so no chance of seeing G and Baby L.
Hello Dubai!
My office admin staff has been amazing. My new office in Dubai is mostly open office format - so the admins set up one of the huddle rooms as a place for me to pump breastmilk for Baby L. They chose the one huddle room that didn't  have any windows, and then they taped paper over the glass door. The room has a plug, so it's everything I need to take care of making food for my baby girl!
The not-so-glamorous side of returning to work while breastfeeding
The admins also found me an extra monitor - I didn't want to  ask for a dual monitor setup since I've already asked for accommodation with flexible hours and a place to pump milk, and they decided I needed a second monitor anyway. So now I have double cuteness to look at while I'm at work.
1
How can you not smile when you come back to this at your desk???
On Friday this week, we got an extra special blessing. One of our friends in Abu Dhabi has a nanny/maid/helper that they don't really need anymore, so they suggested we "borrow" her for a month. This allows us to see if having a live-in helper is an issue for us in terms of privacy, and also allows her to see if she likes working  for us a family. Most expats don't have the opportunity to try it out for a month - they have to make a year-long commitment up front. She had been a Godsend, truly. We were a little uncomfortable at the thought of having someone live in with us, and we just love her. She has so much endless energy - together managed to unpack the sea of boxes in both the master bedroom and the nursery within her first afternoon.

She spent all morning on Saturday cleaning the  apartment, freeing me up to play with Baby L and then when Baby L went down for her afternoon  nap, G and I were able to take some time to walk explore the area around the  apartment. We're both looking forward to her helping G during these last few weeks before his final exams, and he already seems so much less stressed out about school. Hopefully she likes working for us and living in Dubai - we are already ready to hire her on full time!

Next adventures will be wrapping up the last of our business in Abu Dhabi next weekend, and then getting more settled in Dubai. As always, more to come!
Michigan plays Wisconsin tonight, and we know who Baby L is rooting for, even if Mommy put her hairbow on upside-down on accident. :-) Go Blue!

Wednesday, November 8, 2017

Home Hunting Dubai - Finale!

The time has come for us to pack up and move! Our sea shipment arrived and cleared customs much faster than we expected, so this past week has been a whirlwind of trying to get everything ready. This is what the last 7 days have been like.

01 November (Last Wednesday) - We collect the keys to our amazing apartment - we were able to come to agreement with the landlord and rent our first choice property! The apartment is NOT READY! The landlord hadn't completed the repairs and the apartment was still filthy - it was so bad that the landlord's agent asked the electrician to help her clean! What we thought would be an hour handover of keys turned into a 4-hour ordeal waiting for repairs to be completed and cleaning crews to show up. We had hoped for a relaxing weekend in Dubai (we even booked a hotel on the beach!) but that was not the case. I should have known better!

Baby L looking super tiny and super cute in the hotel crib
The Doubletree welcomed us with delicious cookies!
We were upgraded from a balcony suite to a 2-BR suite. Totally unnecessary since we didn't have time to enjoy it, but still nice!
02 November - a quick stroll around the Marina area, then back to the apartment to make sure the cleaning crew and maintenance crews show up. They claimed everything would be done in an hour. 3 hours after they showed up, they were still working - we needed to head back to Abu Dhabi so G could get some schoolwork done, so we had to leave. We hadn't released the 5% agency fees to the Landlord's agent, so essentially that is the only leverage we have to get the work done.

03 November - Astros won the World Series! We watched the final inning after G cooked breakfast. Also we had our first (and probably last) brunch in Abu Dhabi! It was my co-worker's birthday, and we wanted to celebrate with them. If you haven't travelled to the UAE, the thing you have to understand about brunch is that it's essentially when all the expats drink excessively and gorge themselves on buffets while the locals are at mosque for their holy day of obligation. It can be painful if you don't pace yourself. 
All you can eat seafood!
My co-worker (nicknamed JJJ) on the left and G on the right. 2 gingers...dangerous.
04 November - our shipment arrives in port! We'd been tracking the vessel, and it arrived on schedule. However it is also Saturday so nobody is around to actually confirm its arrival for us. I wanted to purchase some local art and I'd been procrastinating so we finally met with an artist whose work I just loved. For anyone interested in beautiful artistic calligraphy from the area, I recommend http://www.pannataheer.com.
We purchased one of the calligraphy pieces on the lower right. Hard to see, but we'll post photos once its hanging in our apartment!
05 November - We got confirmation that our cargo container is in the port, and they think it'll clear customs in 2 days! Exciting!

06 November - G has to drive to Dubai to accept delivery of our refrigerator. He also confirms that all the repair work is complete and the apartment was mostly cleaned. Thuzar from housekeeping came to visit Baby L and I - she is on her annual leave, but she just loves Baby L!! And Baby L loves her - so we were both happy to have a visitor for a few hours!

07 November - Confirmed! Our shipment has cleared customs and will be delivered the next day! Frantic packing ensues as tonight is the last night G will spend in Abu Dhabi. I also make the mistake of taking Baby L to Ikea to buy blackout shades during rush hour. Ikea's website said the Dubai store didn't have any in stock, and you really NEED blackout curtains in this country, so it had to be done! She cried the whole ride there and the whole ride back, but she was wide eyed and curious while we were actually in the store. Go figure.

08 November (today) - G gets up super early to meet the movers and accept our shipment at our apartment in Dubai! Of course, nothing is easy - they brought a truck that was too tall to get into our parking garage, so they have to wait to move everything to a smaller truck. Then they load everything onto the freight elevator, only to discover the freight elevator is blocked by scaffolding on our floor due to maintenance work. Those poor movers definitely earned their wages today. G is spending the night setting up the bedroom, and will get up early to help me move out of Abu Dhabi tomorrow. It seem straightforward to have the movers do everything, but I'm a little obsessive about "getting ready" for movers. I spent most of the day organizing stuff so that all the baby stuff is together and all the electronics are together, etc. Plus laundry, and sorting out what belongs to the hotel vs what belongs to us...it was a long day.
#1 priority - A bed to sleep in!!
The view from our apartment at night!
09 November (tomorrow) - Movers are coming to pack up our belongings in Abu Dhabi and taking them to Dubai...and our bedroom will already be set up, so tomorrow night will be our first night as a family in our new home!!!

Also - I start work on Sunday, so blogging will likely slow down significantly. Or maybe not, who knows? Either way, I'm super sad to leave my little munchkin at home, and at the same time, ready to get my brain back into gear!

Brightpoint Royal Women's Hospital - My Review

I've been thinking about my experience at Brightpoint for some time now, and amidst the chaos of family visiting and moving to Dubai, I've kept putting off my review of the hospital. Very few of my friends and family who read this blog (actually, probably none) will ever set foot in the hospital, let alone deliver a baby there. At the same time, there is limited up-to-date information about hospital situation for pregnant women in Abu Dhabi - I know in my search of the internet when I was looking for a hospital, I wished more information was available.

As I note in my post Somebody...Anybody...please deliver my baby? I had a hard time finding a doctor in Abu Dhabi. Before forking out a copay, I didn't ask the right questions up front - so what are the right questions to ask when making an appointment with a potential new obstetrician when you're already pregnant?

1. Are you available at the time of my due date?
2. Does your clinic accept my insurance?
3. What hospital do you deliver at (and does that hospital take my insurance)?

If I had asked these questions, it would have saved me a ton of time, as well as the heartbreak of meeting doctors I liked and then not being able to actually continue with them. In the end though, I found Dr. Georgeta (whom I LOVE - more on that later) so it all turned out ok.

Note that these comments come solely from my experience. Other patients may have experienced the hospital differently.

Prenatal (Antenatal) Education
Brightpoint's prenatal education program is great. We really loved the (FREE!) Hala Baby program - it is totally individualized for each mommy-to-be, and Aparna is super knowledgeable. Sometimes she speaks really fast though, so you may need to ask her to slow down and repeat herself! The only disappointment for me was that since the appointments were one-on-one, I didn't get to meet other expecting mothers - this, however was a super ultra bonus for G because he preferred the one-on-one to a group class. So it worked out for both of us.

The also offer yoga classes for expectant mothers, but I never went, so I can't say much about that service.

Prenatal Doctors Appointments
Scheduling appointments at Brightpoint is super easy. The staff handling appointments and insurance pre-authorizations are generally very good. My only real comment here is that during the summer holiday, the doctors go on vacations so wait times will be extended. When Dr. Georgeta went on vacation, I think I waited an hour once to see my backup doctor. It wasn't her fault, the hospital was just very busy and short staffed - doctors may go on vacation, and babies don't suddenly stop being born when they do! Also - I just want to note that while Dr. Georgeta was on vacation about 6 weeks before my due date, I never once felt that I wasn't under a doctor's care. My backup doctor was very thorough in reviewing my birth plan wishes, and when she also left for a vacation about a week before Dr. Georgeta came back, I was instructed me to call the head of the department if I went into labor early. In terms of physician coverage I was very satisfied.

Labor
I didn't love laboring at the hospital. When we took our tour, we were shown these beautiful birthing suites with bathtubs and lovely views. The problem is that there are only 3 birthing suites, and there were so many pregnant women coming to the hospital at the same time that I was laboring there that they had to have me labor in a regular room...and I'm fairly certain my situation was not unusual. I was finally able to go up from my hospital room to the birthing suite once my water broke and I had an epidural, however use of the tub wasn't allowed once my water broke, and I wasn't allowed to leave the chair once I had the epidural anyway.

My guess is that those lovely bathtubs rarely, if ever, get used because the required turnover for the birthing suites is so high. While I was up in my birthing suite, both of the other suites were occupied, and a woman was giving birth in the assessment room (where you first go when you arrive at the hospital so the staff can determine how far into labor you are). I was very jealous of that woman in the assessment room - she came into the hospital off the street, and delivered her baby 30 minutes later. I could hear her screams. I had been in labor for hours and hours and I just wanted my baby out of me!

Also - I felt the CTG machine that was monitoring my contractions and my baby's heartbeat was not accurate, and the inaccuracy of the machine caused me a large amount of discomfort (and possibly a longer labor than necessary). The nurses kept wanting me to lie down on my back because sitting up meant they couldn't get clear readings on the CTG. Laying down was really uncomfortable for me on both sides, and had I been able to sit more upright, gravity would likely have helped progress my labor faster. I was finally saved by a midwife who told me sitting up was just fine, but not before I was uncomfortable for several hours. I'd suggest to mothers in this situation where you disagree with the nurses to push to ask the midwife for a second opinion - be your own advocate.

Another thing to note is that I'm not sure if it's Brightpoint policy or Dr. Georgeta's policy, I was allowed 2 people in the birthing suite with me. Obviously, my husband G was there, and I also had Lacey, my friend and photographer. I spoke with Dr. Georgeta about having someone take photographs ahead of time, so she knew it was happening and was totally ok with it. I'm so glad Lacey was there, my Baby Story - Birth Story Photos are AMAZING!

Delivery
Again, I LOVE my doctor. After a long and frustrating labor, once I was far enough along for the nurses to call her, she was so calm and talked me through the delivery...I think I spent maybe 15 minutes pushing. Maybe less. She talked through her reasoning behind her instructions (don't push when it's not the right time, you'll just waste energy!) and she had a very calming nature about her. Plus she honored my birthplan, and for that I was so thankful. I can't say for sure, but with another doctor, I may have ended up with a C-Section since my labor was progressing so slowly after my water broke. Who knows? I'm glad I was able to deliver vaginally.

One side comment that is important to note - I was given a card telling me what to bring for my child. The card said baby clothes, baby bath towel, and diapers. So we brought exactly that - a few onesies, a bath towel, and some diapers & wipes. You also need to bring socks, mittens, hats, and blankets. The hospital has blankets, but they do not have the other stuff. Also, there were plenty of diapers at the hospital - so that card is not super accurate. I remember my anxiety during and after labor when the neonatal nurses were asking my husband "where are the blankets? where are the hats? mittens?" when we weren't instructed to bring any of those things!!! Luckily I had stashed a hat into my delivery bag along with socks - they used the socks on both her hands and feet, and used the towel I brought as a blanket.

Also - the hospital provides adult diapers for post delivery, and they are literally diapers just like a baby would wear, but for grown-ups. They're hard to put on, and they're baggy and saggy and weird - I'd recommend buying a package of Depends or adult diaper briefs that pull on like underwear - I found them to be much more comfortable than what the hospital provided.

Post-Delivery
Here is where the rubber meets the road, and why I 100% recommend Brightpoint, despite any of my complaints. Lacey told me later that she knew things were not quite right because Baby L was covered in more blood than she should have been. My post-delivery was complicated, I hemorrhaged and lost a litre of blood. Again, Dr. Georgeta was cool as a cucumber, and everything turned out just fine.

My post-delivery care was phenomenal. Again, I had some arguments with nurses, and I need to be more vocal about my pain, however overall, in general the nurses are very kind and nurturing.

The pediatric department also took excellent care of my baby. I was able to rest and recover - and while sleeping in a hospital is never fun (vital sign checks all. night. long.), I was thankful for the support.

Since I had an extended stay, I pretty much tried everything on the menu. All the breakfast options were decent. I would avoid the western food options for lunch and dinner and stick with either the Arabic or Asian/Indian options. The western choices were pretty terrible, the others were actually pretty good. The desserts were also pretty bland. I really loved the high fiber cookie that was a snack option (not to be confused with the digestive crackers - those were like cardboard). I never went hungry at the hospital, which is saying something because after my blood transfusion, I wanted to eat all the time.

Pediatrics
I wouldn't say I love the pediatrics department as much as I love the OB/GYN department. The neonatologists and pediatricians are very good, and took excellent care of my baby while she was in the hospital. They also took good care of her after, I just always feel judged by Baby L's doctors when I bring her in for checkups. Maybe it's just me. Either way, I started bringing my husband along, and that judge-y feeling went away.

For more details on my actual birth story, I've written them here - I tried to keep this post fairly focused on reviewing the hospital itself! Thanks for reading!

Birth Story

Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Saying Good-Bye is Hard to Do!

After 9 months in Abu Dhabi, it's time to start saying goodbye to the few friends we've made here! While G and I are super excited to move to Dubai (we track the sea freighter that has our furniture shipment daily), I am a bit nostalgic about leaving Abu Dhabi. Obviously, it will always hold a special place in my heart since my precious Baby L was born here. I mentioned in previous posts that Abu Dhabi has been a bit of a lonely assignment for me because it was hard to meet people while pregnant, but we did make a couple really good friends that we wanted to have lunch with before we moved.

First we had lunch with my coworker's wife, who helped us witness documents at the Embassy for Baby L. I wanted to give Jeanne a little thank you gift for helping us with our embassy documents and I knew she loved pho, so I put together a little care package of spices including my dad's recipe.  We had a fun little lunch at a Vietnamese restaurant out on Al Raha Island with her oldest and youngest kiddos and Baby L. The pho was just ok - it was a bit greasy and there was under-cooked garlic in my bowl, but when the options are limited, you take what you can get! I told Jeanne she is welcome to visit us in Dubai any time!
Jeanne loving on Baby L!
Later this week, we had lunch with Lacey, our photographer here in Abu Dhabi. We've done three photo sessions with Lacey, and I love working with her. She also loves on Baby L like crazy, and I wanted to get a photo of them together so Baby L would know who took all her beautiful baby photos! Sadly, Lacey is moving back to the USA early next year, and we will miss her dearly!
Cuddles with L & L!
Other than that, things have been pretty low key around here. I've been trying to build up my milk supply for when I go back to work, which has taken up a bunch of room in the freezer.  Since our tiny freezer does not auto-defrost, the drawer that I store milk in finally froze shut this week and G had to manually defrost it. We are looking forward to a freezer with auto-defrost...neither of us had seen a freezer without it since the 1980's. When he took the drawer out the frost on the coils was taking up over half the drawer! I know he was hoping to not have to defrost it before we left, but it was really getting out of hand.
G defrosting our tiny freezer so I can keep pumping and storing milk
We're also still trying to bottle train Baby L. It is honestly the worst part of my day because she cries and cries and looks at me with such frustration. G has the same experience when he tries. If I did it over again, I would have put her on a bottle more regularly early on, because now it's a struggle. I wish G good luck when I leave for work because it's not going to be fun for him. :-(

We've started nap training Baby L to get her onto a rough schedule. So far, we've got her regularly going down for a morning nap about two hours after she wakes up...we're still working on the rest of the day. I'm sure as soon as we've figured out a routine for her, she'll have a growth spurt and change...since that's what babies do!

I still can't believe how much she's changed in only two months. The bedtime swaddle went from too big to too small in such a short period of time! Same thing for the two hats that G's mom made for her - too big to snug so quickly! I feel less anxiety about how fast she's growing now that she smiles and coos at us because it's easier to enjoy the new changes and developments. I still miss my super sleepy cuddly newborn, and I'm in love and excited to keep watching my little baby grow.
Baby L - on Day 2 on the left, at 10 weeks on the right.

Sunday, October 22, 2017

Baby L is 2 months old!

Baby L turns 2 months old today, and I just can't believe how much she has grown! People still tell me she's teeny tiny, and to me she seems huge. She also doesn't seem nearly as fragile as she did when she was first born - she weighs 50% more, and definitely feels more solid.
Couldn't get her to smile, so settled for getting her to sleep!
She's started smiling real full-gums-showing smiles at us where her whole face lights up, she's started cooing at us and having little coo coo conversations, and she's started making this weird clicking sound with her tongue - I think she learned it from Thuzar from housekeeping. She also (mostly) sleeps through the night! I usually get a good stretch from 7 or 8pm to midnight, and then she'll wake up to eat roughly every 2-3 hours after that. G and I suspect that she is actually awake for parts of the night, and that since we keep the room dark, she knows it's nighttime and puts herself back to sleep until she's hungry. She is definitely most cheerful in the morning - if there is any sunlight in the bathroom when I change her diaper, it's over, she's wide awake, grinning and cooing like there's no tomorrow.
Her whole face lights up when she smiles!
We've started trying to bottle train her with a little more consistency - previously, we only gave her a bottle if either I left her for a certain period of time (massage, errands, date night, whatever), or if my nipples went on strike from her biting them with her gums. Thankfully the latter is happening less and less! She is not fond of the bottle, and I honestly wish we'd started bottle training her sooner - I was so nervous about nipple confusion and wanting to breastfeed her that we're running into the opposite problem - she fights the bottle. We're hoping that a daily bottle will help her get used to it so G doesn't have to spend literally all day trying to feed her.

G has also discovered the magic of the Ergobaby carrier. He was commenting on how carrying her around the house to try to soothe her into a nap was hard on his shoulder, so I suggested he put her in the carrier - and sure enough she was out like a light in minutes. His current challenge is getting her from the carrier into the bassinet without waking her up!

G, going about his day with Baby L fast asleep on his chest!

We have a long list of nicknames we call her...
  • Sweetpea
  • Sunshine
  • Peanut
  • Super Pooper
  • Poop Shooter
  • Spider Monkey
  • Turd Monkey
  • Stinker
  • Whah-mobile (when she's crying)
  • Poonami
  • Wiggles
  • Squeaks
  • Sea Turtle
  • #grumpybaby
She still flails her arms and legs quite a bit, and she still hates tummy time. I try to find alternatives to tummy time on the floor and most of them still end in tears. We'll keep trying, and we've decided it's ok if her physical milestones like crawling and walking are slightly delayed. There's a little clip of her flailing and squealing below.
Interestingly enough, her doula suggested that I try letting her sleep on her tummy when she's sitting next to me so I can keep an eye on her head position. It's not quite as beneficial as awake tummy time, but it might help her get a little more accustomed to being on her stomach. Apparently babies also sleep better on their tummies - I tried it, and she had the longest nap she's ever taken without either being held by someone or being in a carseat! She startles a lot less on her tummy, so I can definitely see why in the 80's and 90's parents were told to lay infants on their stomach to sleep. It was also fun to watch her lift up her head in her sleep to change positions without crying - a nice change from the tears!
Does tummy time count if you're asleep?!?
Things we're NOT looking forward to are her 2-month checkup and vaccinations. I'm bringing G with me to the appointment because her doctor is definitely LESS overbearing when he's with us - it's our last appointment with her anyway before we find Baby L a new doctor in Dubai. We're bracing ourselves for an unhappy Baby L when she gets her shots later this week.

We're enjoying these last few weeks in where we're all home as a family in Abu Dhabi before we move to Dubai and I go back to work. I'll definitely be bummed that I can't just walk downstairs to buy delicious little cakes for her monthly photographs! I'm feeling almost fully recovered - my hemogloblin is up, and I'm walking for 20-30 minutes 2-3 times per week. I'm back to pre-Baby L weight, although I put on some pounds with our pre-Baby L miscarriage that I've yet to work off. I'm targeting to shed those pounds by the end of the year. Of course now that G and I finally have a routine down to accommodate both our workout schedules and his schoolwork, it will all change - such is life, especially with a baby!
Look Mommy, I can grip it with two hands!

#MeToo

Much like so many of the other women who posted #MeToo, I was hesitant to share my stories. Brene Brown teaches us that "vulnerability is about showing up and being seen", and that if we can share our story with someone who responds with empathy and understanding, shame can’t survive. These are my stories.

Junior High
I was "going out" with a sweet boy. Which basically means we talked on the phone after school sometimes - and he was publicly my "boyfriend". We didn't really hold hands or kiss, and we bought each other presents for Christmas and Valentine's day. One day in science class, another not-so-sweet boy said to me, "You know, he's only going out with you because of your boobs." He might have been kidding, he might not have. Either way, I had a reputation for a hot temper, so I marched down to the principal's office and asked the secretaries if I could see the principal when he had time. A few hours later, my temper had cooled to anxiety and I received my summons to his office. Of course, when the aide came to class to tell the teacher the principal was asking to see me, the whole class did they're typical "ooooOOoo", and I blushed furiously as I exited the classroom. I remember my hands shaking when I went into his office and told him my story - I was so proud of myself for not crying. My junior high principal is a man that I have great respect for - he didn't question me, and that not-so-sweet boy was sent to in-house suspension for a week. I am very fortunate that he believed me, because there are many, many girls who in the same situation would have been told "well, boys will be boys".

What happened next was harder to deal with. Of course, by now, everyone knew why that boy was suspended, and because of his suspension was no longer permitted to go on some class trip (I can't remember where). I was called a tattle-tale, a bitch, and many unsavory names by his friends - I was made somewhat of a pariah for standing up for myself. Grade school children can be cruel, and friends of bullies can be the cruelest. Thankfully, I also had great friends who reminded me that I did the right thing and not to sweat it. It's important to note that #MeToo isn't just women in the workplace - I was a girl in school. I was maybe 12 or 13 years old. I ask the men out there, how would you feel if this is what your daughters were experiencing in a place where they are supposed to be safe? More than just #HowWillIChange that I see from my male friends, what will you teach your children?

High School
At the school I went to, the graduating senior class had an all-night party after the graduation ceremony. We called it "Project Graduation", and it was planned for us by group made up of parent volunteers. We'd load up onto busses and make several stops at different venues, all of which were supposed to be a "surprise" (but of course, since it was planned by our parents and teenagers gossip, we all knew what the stops were. There are only so many places you can go in the town I grew up in anyway).

In between a pair of stops, I was hanging out with one of my male friends (we'll call him X). I was tired, and pretty sleepy and he offered me a backrub. What I thought was starting as a friendly backrub turned into him fondling my breasts - I wasn't sure what to make of it, and I was uncomfortable, but I don't think I stopped him. I should have. I don't recall exactly how it ended, but I think I pretended to fall asleep. I heard later from other boys in my class "hey, I heard X got to third base with you!" It was incredibly embarrassing and I still feel a little ashamed that I let it happen. X and I never talked about it, and we went on our separate ways to different colleges - last I heard I think he's married with children, and I wonder what he would teach them.

University
I don't recall any specific stories from college. I know that almost immediately after meeting other men, I'd emphasize my long-term boyfriend who was at Purdue as a self-defense mechanism. I also had a pretty strong shift in the company I kept. In high school I had a lot of guy friends - I'd hang out at my friend Brett or Sam's house (neither of them are X) and we'd play video games, or I'd hang out at my friend Eric's house (also not X) and just generally be silly. I had girlfriends in high school too, I'd say the group of friends I hung out with was pretty evenly split between guys and girls. I tended to create a lot of my own drama (right, Jamie?!?), and hanging out with drama-free guys meant there was less drama all around.

In college, I hardly hung out with guys at all. I lived in an all-women's residence all. I joined a service sorority that was mostly female...I think there were only 2 or 3 "Mister Sisters" when I was there. I played the piccolo which was 30 women and 3 men. Ironically, one of my closest friends was one of those 3 men. Hah! Even in my department, I gravitated toward building friendships with other women instead of men. I'm sure I experienced sexual harassment in college, but none of them stand out as vividly as my examples from grade school.

Professional Life
I am blessed that I have not experienced overt sexual harassment in the workplace. Gender discrimination for sure, and that is a whole different topic for a different day. My first place of employment - a mid-sized construction firm in Minneapolis - was amazing. I felt supported as a professional woman, my ideas were respected, and the people were great. I had one not-so-great boss (who no longer works for them), and my issues with him didn't really have much to do with me being a woman as they did with him being arrogant and condescending (to everyone). The main reason I left was that it was, in fact, a mid-size firm without much vertical movement for me - I was there while my first husband finished his PhD, and then I moved on to a much larger corporation with much larger projects in oil & gas.

At my current company, again, I sense a lot of support for women, and sexual harassment as far as I know is not tolerated. Moreso than my first company, I experience strong-yet-subtle gender discrimination, and again, different topic for a different day. Unfortunately the most vivid sexual harassment experience I've had as an adult was during a business trip, though outside the workplace. I was on an assignment which required me to travel to Jakarta, Indonesia for roughly 3-6 weeks at at time. Over the course of a year, I went to Jakarta 7 times - which meant I spent most of that year in various stages of jet lag. One night, I decided to dine alone at one of the venues in my hotel - a lot of the business travellers liked to hang out in the club upstairs, and as an introvert, sometimes I just wanted to eat by myself. I was literally propositioned by a man while I was eating. I politely explained to him in my very American accent that I was at the hotel for professional business, and he had the decency to apologize and appear embarrassed. On the one hand I "should have known better" - the bar I was eating at was known for 2 things, a great hamburger and prostitution late in the evening, and since I look ubiquitously Asian, it's probably not too hard to mistake me for one of the working girls. On the other hand - it was early, around 6:30pm, and I shouldn't have to "know better" - while it might have been a different country, the clientele was all westerners. It was after work, I was dressed professionally - pants, a blouse, a jacket, and my wedding ring. I should be able to eat my dinner peacefully without being asked about the going rate for my services.

I share these stories because sexual harassment is so real and so pervasive in our society. I was watching Zoolander with my husband the other night - which used to be one of my favorite movies. I've been making Zoolander jokes about the tiny phone he bought (since he has to carry a USA phone and a UAE phone, he didn't want 2 large phones) and about Baby L since she favors turning her head to the right instead of to the left. I hadn't seen the movie in years, and re-watching it, I was shocked at the objectification of women in the movie. It seemed funny then, and seems a lot less funny now. I still enjoyed the movie, and I think I will probably take it off my favorites list.

I hope that my daughter doesn't have to have experiences like mine, although the cynic in me says that she will. I put my faith in God to make her strong, in my husband to teach her how a man should treat a woman, and in the strong female role models that she will have in her life to teach her to stand up for herself -- my two sisters, myself, and all the great women that I have surrounded myself with.