Sunday, November 26, 2017

Counting our Blessings this Thanksgiving Holiday

We celebrated our first Thanksgiving overseas, and to be honest, it sort of snuck up on us. The combination of moving to Dubai, going back to work, and not seeing any Thanksgiving advertising made it easy to almost forget this traditional American holiday. Fortunately, Facebook and our families made sure we didn't forget!

I'm so thankful for my family. G is always so supportive of everything I do, and while Baby L can be a challenging (or as the host of our morning radio program here in UAE puts it, she is a "lifestyle inhibitor"), she brightens our life in ways we didn't know possible. I took the afternoon off work on Thanksgiving Day so I could spend some quality cuddles with this baby girl (and also so G and I could go buy some rugs for our apartment before weekend rush-hour traffic hit Dubai).
Hey, Mom! It's my 3-month birthday!!
I'm not so sure about this cupcake...or this flower thing on my head...
Ok, fine, I will smile with this thing on my head. :-)
This brings me to the second thing that I'm thankful for - our nanny, Miss J. Week 2 at work was with Miss J in our home, and it was much smoother than Week 1. G was able to study, do homework, and even get a few house projects done. Miss J is a Filipino national who raised 5 children of her own and has 2 grandkids - so she has definitely taught me a thing or two about caring for a baby! She is a huge blessing in our life, and we're so happy to have her as part of our family. Baby L is too!

Miss J with Baby L - seriously, does this woman look old enough to have grand kids!!! She is so amazing with endless energy, and we love having her in our home.
We celebrated Thanksgiving with other expats back in Abu Dhabi. This allowed us to do two things - one, obviously, have some turkey and classic Thanksgiving dishes and two, it allowed us to say one last goodbye to the housekeeping staff at our old apartment before we did our final walkthrough and turn-in of our keys. These are the next two things I'm thankful for - our expat family who help us celebrate traditions from home while we are away (thanks Jeanne, the food was amazing!!!), and the wonderful housekeeping staff who took care of us while we lived in Abu Dhabi.

Friday Thanksgiving at Jeanne's home was a bit chaotic - there were 5 families celebrating, 2 families with 4 kids each, 1 family with 3 kids, our family with 1 kiddo, and 1 younger couple that didn't have kids yet. 12 kids ranging in age from 3 months to 15 years was probably some awesome birth control for that couple! All joking aside, we had a good time and really enjoyed both the company and sharing the evening with other families. All the chaos was a little overwhelming for Baby L, so unfortunately, no photos - thankfully (see Thankful Item #2!) Miss J was able to keep Baby L calm so G and I could socialize a little bit! And since Jeanne was Miss J's previous employer, she was very familiar with the home and all the quieter places we could keep Baby L since she wasn't use to having so many kids rough and tumbling around her.

Saturday was a lot more laid back for Baby L and me. G and Miss J ran errands in Abu Dhabi so Baby L and I got a few hours of cuddles with just the two of us in our old apartment - it was so nostalgic for me. This apartment, for all its quirks that drove us crazy while we lived here, will always hold a special place in my heart. It's the home where I spent most of my pregnancy and all of my maternity leave, my baby's first home. I cried a few times, especially with Miss Thuzar from housekeeping came by to give Baby L and I hugs. I remember sitting in my rocking chair with Baby L the afternoon after Dad left, crying and trying not to look like I was crying, and Thuzar pretending not to notice I was crying but telling me to call her anytime if I needed something. Seeing her every day is one of the things I will miss most about living here. I'm so thankful that she came into our lives, and she will always be Baby L's first friend!
Baby L and I, napping on the sofa just like when she was a newborn!
After G and Miss J came home, we took a tourist walk around the hotel - from the stunning 74th floor observation deck to the sparkly ceiling at the ballroom level - it was a fun little way to take in everything one last time. After all, unless we stay here again as guests, we won't have access to it for free anymore!
Selfies at the ballroom ceiling! It is much more sparkly in person - it's hard to see all the crystals in the photo.
Sunday (today) we did our final check out walkthrough and say a true and final good-bye to life in Abu Dhabi for now. I'm thankful for all the wonderful memories we've made here, and I'm thankful for all the future memories we will make in our new home!

And of course - since it's the weekend of THE Game, Baby L has a message for everyone at home...

Go Blue!!!

Saturday, November 18, 2017

First Week At Work

My first week back to work went (for me) better than expected. I cried a lot on Saturday - partially because I was frustrated with how little I was able to unpack because I needed to look after Baby L, and partially because I wanted to savor every last moment with Baby L but was living amidst a sea of boxes.  It was a really tough weekend, between setting up the new home and dealing with separation anxiety.

Hard to say goodbye to this little peanut!
The home part of returning to work has been really hard. I hate leaving Baby L in the mornings when she is super cheerful. She had a hard time taking a bottle at the beginning of the week too, so when I came home, she was fussy and hungry and just wanted to eat and eat and eat and pass out. I considered flexing my time to come into the office later and stay later so I could enjoy happy time with the baby and be available for my supervisor. With her new eating routine, if I flexed later, she would go hungry all day and then keep me up all night trying to eat, so we'll be keeping on this schedule in the near term. The goal is for Baby L to eat about 12 ounces while I'm away, and at the beginning of the week it was only 5-6 ounces. By Thursday, she had 10-12 ounces - so we're getting there, slowly but surely! G has been a champ, very patiently feeding her even when it takes literally all day.
Baby L just wants to eat and sleep and eat some more from when I get home to bedtime.
The home part has been hard for G as well. She's been particularly needy since I've returned to work, so he hasn't been able to spend as much time as he'd like on unpacking or on his coursework. The good part of this bonding time he's had with her is that now she actively looks for him when she hears his voice - like she'll stop nursing to find him when he's talking to me. This is simultaneously annoying and sweet.

Each night, after Baby L went to bed, I tried to wrap up a few loose ends at work and then assemble a little piece of her nursery. The  most frustrating thing was her dresser/changing table. I was so excited to have a place to put her clothes and  burp cloths that wasn't cardboard boxes and suitcases - only to discover that the beautiful dresser I purchased didn't come with any of the right hardware!! I'm currently working with Graco/Storkcraft to get the hardware sent to UAE, and in the meantime, we're still using cardboard boxes. At least her crib and rocking chair (both also Graco/Storkcraft) came together without any issue.

Baby L's dresser is a useless pile of lumber until the hardware arrives. I'd go buy all the hardware myself, but I'm not sure I'd be able to find all the weird little bushings and cams here in UAE.
The work part of returning to work has been great. Everyone on my team has been so kind and seems to be genuinely happy to have me back. It feels good to have some professional stimulation. My supervisor has been accommodating and allowed me to flex my schedule so that I'm in the office from 7:30am to 4pm, and then I log back in at 7pm after Baby L is asleep. I know it's hard for him to allow me to make that change since he is located in Basra, so my "away" time is 3pm-6pm -- his prime productive time. So far, it seems to be ok.

Another bonus is that I can take the metro to work every morning, and it's just as fast and half the  price of taking a taxi. And I can't beat the view of Dubai from my office - I can even see our apartment building, though our actual apartment is on the side facing away  from my office, so no chance of seeing G and Baby L.
Hello Dubai!
My office admin staff has been amazing. My new office in Dubai is mostly open office format - so the admins set up one of the huddle rooms as a place for me to pump breastmilk for Baby L. They chose the one huddle room that didn't  have any windows, and then they taped paper over the glass door. The room has a plug, so it's everything I need to take care of making food for my baby girl!
The not-so-glamorous side of returning to work while breastfeeding
The admins also found me an extra monitor - I didn't want to  ask for a dual monitor setup since I've already asked for accommodation with flexible hours and a place to pump milk, and they decided I needed a second monitor anyway. So now I have double cuteness to look at while I'm at work.
1
How can you not smile when you come back to this at your desk???
On Friday this week, we got an extra special blessing. One of our friends in Abu Dhabi has a nanny/maid/helper that they don't really need anymore, so they suggested we "borrow" her for a month. This allows us to see if having a live-in helper is an issue for us in terms of privacy, and also allows her to see if she likes working  for us a family. Most expats don't have the opportunity to try it out for a month - they have to make a year-long commitment up front. She had been a Godsend, truly. We were a little uncomfortable at the thought of having someone live in with us, and we just love her. She has so much endless energy - together managed to unpack the sea of boxes in both the master bedroom and the nursery within her first afternoon.

She spent all morning on Saturday cleaning the  apartment, freeing me up to play with Baby L and then when Baby L went down for her afternoon  nap, G and I were able to take some time to walk explore the area around the  apartment. We're both looking forward to her helping G during these last few weeks before his final exams, and he already seems so much less stressed out about school. Hopefully she likes working for us and living in Dubai - we are already ready to hire her on full time!

Next adventures will be wrapping up the last of our business in Abu Dhabi next weekend, and then getting more settled in Dubai. As always, more to come!
Michigan plays Wisconsin tonight, and we know who Baby L is rooting for, even if Mommy put her hairbow on upside-down on accident. :-) Go Blue!

Wednesday, November 8, 2017

Home Hunting Dubai - Finale!

The time has come for us to pack up and move! Our sea shipment arrived and cleared customs much faster than we expected, so this past week has been a whirlwind of trying to get everything ready. This is what the last 7 days have been like.

01 November (Last Wednesday) - We collect the keys to our amazing apartment - we were able to come to agreement with the landlord and rent our first choice property! The apartment is NOT READY! The landlord hadn't completed the repairs and the apartment was still filthy - it was so bad that the landlord's agent asked the electrician to help her clean! What we thought would be an hour handover of keys turned into a 4-hour ordeal waiting for repairs to be completed and cleaning crews to show up. We had hoped for a relaxing weekend in Dubai (we even booked a hotel on the beach!) but that was not the case. I should have known better!

Baby L looking super tiny and super cute in the hotel crib
The Doubletree welcomed us with delicious cookies!
We were upgraded from a balcony suite to a 2-BR suite. Totally unnecessary since we didn't have time to enjoy it, but still nice!
02 November - a quick stroll around the Marina area, then back to the apartment to make sure the cleaning crew and maintenance crews show up. They claimed everything would be done in an hour. 3 hours after they showed up, they were still working - we needed to head back to Abu Dhabi so G could get some schoolwork done, so we had to leave. We hadn't released the 5% agency fees to the Landlord's agent, so essentially that is the only leverage we have to get the work done.

03 November - Astros won the World Series! We watched the final inning after G cooked breakfast. Also we had our first (and probably last) brunch in Abu Dhabi! It was my co-worker's birthday, and we wanted to celebrate with them. If you haven't travelled to the UAE, the thing you have to understand about brunch is that it's essentially when all the expats drink excessively and gorge themselves on buffets while the locals are at mosque for their holy day of obligation. It can be painful if you don't pace yourself. 
All you can eat seafood!
My co-worker (nicknamed JJJ) on the left and G on the right. 2 gingers...dangerous.
04 November - our shipment arrives in port! We'd been tracking the vessel, and it arrived on schedule. However it is also Saturday so nobody is around to actually confirm its arrival for us. I wanted to purchase some local art and I'd been procrastinating so we finally met with an artist whose work I just loved. For anyone interested in beautiful artistic calligraphy from the area, I recommend http://www.pannataheer.com.
We purchased one of the calligraphy pieces on the lower right. Hard to see, but we'll post photos once its hanging in our apartment!
05 November - We got confirmation that our cargo container is in the port, and they think it'll clear customs in 2 days! Exciting!

06 November - G has to drive to Dubai to accept delivery of our refrigerator. He also confirms that all the repair work is complete and the apartment was mostly cleaned. Thuzar from housekeeping came to visit Baby L and I - she is on her annual leave, but she just loves Baby L!! And Baby L loves her - so we were both happy to have a visitor for a few hours!

07 November - Confirmed! Our shipment has cleared customs and will be delivered the next day! Frantic packing ensues as tonight is the last night G will spend in Abu Dhabi. I also make the mistake of taking Baby L to Ikea to buy blackout shades during rush hour. Ikea's website said the Dubai store didn't have any in stock, and you really NEED blackout curtains in this country, so it had to be done! She cried the whole ride there and the whole ride back, but she was wide eyed and curious while we were actually in the store. Go figure.

08 November (today) - G gets up super early to meet the movers and accept our shipment at our apartment in Dubai! Of course, nothing is easy - they brought a truck that was too tall to get into our parking garage, so they have to wait to move everything to a smaller truck. Then they load everything onto the freight elevator, only to discover the freight elevator is blocked by scaffolding on our floor due to maintenance work. Those poor movers definitely earned their wages today. G is spending the night setting up the bedroom, and will get up early to help me move out of Abu Dhabi tomorrow. It seem straightforward to have the movers do everything, but I'm a little obsessive about "getting ready" for movers. I spent most of the day organizing stuff so that all the baby stuff is together and all the electronics are together, etc. Plus laundry, and sorting out what belongs to the hotel vs what belongs to us...it was a long day.
#1 priority - A bed to sleep in!!
The view from our apartment at night!
09 November (tomorrow) - Movers are coming to pack up our belongings in Abu Dhabi and taking them to Dubai...and our bedroom will already be set up, so tomorrow night will be our first night as a family in our new home!!!

Also - I start work on Sunday, so blogging will likely slow down significantly. Or maybe not, who knows? Either way, I'm super sad to leave my little munchkin at home, and at the same time, ready to get my brain back into gear!

Brightpoint Royal Women's Hospital - My Review

I've been thinking about my experience at Brightpoint for some time now, and amidst the chaos of family visiting and moving to Dubai, I've kept putting off my review of the hospital. Very few of my friends and family who read this blog (actually, probably none) will ever set foot in the hospital, let alone deliver a baby there. At the same time, there is limited up-to-date information about hospital situation for pregnant women in Abu Dhabi - I know in my search of the internet when I was looking for a hospital, I wished more information was available.

As I note in my post Somebody...Anybody...please deliver my baby? I had a hard time finding a doctor in Abu Dhabi. Before forking out a copay, I didn't ask the right questions up front - so what are the right questions to ask when making an appointment with a potential new obstetrician when you're already pregnant?

1. Are you available at the time of my due date?
2. Does your clinic accept my insurance?
3. What hospital do you deliver at (and does that hospital take my insurance)?

If I had asked these questions, it would have saved me a ton of time, as well as the heartbreak of meeting doctors I liked and then not being able to actually continue with them. In the end though, I found Dr. Georgeta (whom I LOVE - more on that later) so it all turned out ok.

Note that these comments come solely from my experience. Other patients may have experienced the hospital differently.

Prenatal (Antenatal) Education
Brightpoint's prenatal education program is great. We really loved the (FREE!) Hala Baby program - it is totally individualized for each mommy-to-be, and Aparna is super knowledgeable. Sometimes she speaks really fast though, so you may need to ask her to slow down and repeat herself! The only disappointment for me was that since the appointments were one-on-one, I didn't get to meet other expecting mothers - this, however was a super ultra bonus for G because he preferred the one-on-one to a group class. So it worked out for both of us.

The also offer yoga classes for expectant mothers, but I never went, so I can't say much about that service.

Prenatal Doctors Appointments
Scheduling appointments at Brightpoint is super easy. The staff handling appointments and insurance pre-authorizations are generally very good. My only real comment here is that during the summer holiday, the doctors go on vacations so wait times will be extended. When Dr. Georgeta went on vacation, I think I waited an hour once to see my backup doctor. It wasn't her fault, the hospital was just very busy and short staffed - doctors may go on vacation, and babies don't suddenly stop being born when they do! Also - I just want to note that while Dr. Georgeta was on vacation about 6 weeks before my due date, I never once felt that I wasn't under a doctor's care. My backup doctor was very thorough in reviewing my birth plan wishes, and when she also left for a vacation about a week before Dr. Georgeta came back, I was instructed me to call the head of the department if I went into labor early. In terms of physician coverage I was very satisfied.

Labor
I didn't love laboring at the hospital. When we took our tour, we were shown these beautiful birthing suites with bathtubs and lovely views. The problem is that there are only 3 birthing suites, and there were so many pregnant women coming to the hospital at the same time that I was laboring there that they had to have me labor in a regular room...and I'm fairly certain my situation was not unusual. I was finally able to go up from my hospital room to the birthing suite once my water broke and I had an epidural, however use of the tub wasn't allowed once my water broke, and I wasn't allowed to leave the chair once I had the epidural anyway.

My guess is that those lovely bathtubs rarely, if ever, get used because the required turnover for the birthing suites is so high. While I was up in my birthing suite, both of the other suites were occupied, and a woman was giving birth in the assessment room (where you first go when you arrive at the hospital so the staff can determine how far into labor you are). I was very jealous of that woman in the assessment room - she came into the hospital off the street, and delivered her baby 30 minutes later. I could hear her screams. I had been in labor for hours and hours and I just wanted my baby out of me!

Also - I felt the CTG machine that was monitoring my contractions and my baby's heartbeat was not accurate, and the inaccuracy of the machine caused me a large amount of discomfort (and possibly a longer labor than necessary). The nurses kept wanting me to lie down on my back because sitting up meant they couldn't get clear readings on the CTG. Laying down was really uncomfortable for me on both sides, and had I been able to sit more upright, gravity would likely have helped progress my labor faster. I was finally saved by a midwife who told me sitting up was just fine, but not before I was uncomfortable for several hours. I'd suggest to mothers in this situation where you disagree with the nurses to push to ask the midwife for a second opinion - be your own advocate.

Another thing to note is that I'm not sure if it's Brightpoint policy or Dr. Georgeta's policy, I was allowed 2 people in the birthing suite with me. Obviously, my husband G was there, and I also had Lacey, my friend and photographer. I spoke with Dr. Georgeta about having someone take photographs ahead of time, so she knew it was happening and was totally ok with it. I'm so glad Lacey was there, my Baby Story - Birth Story Photos are AMAZING!

Delivery
Again, I LOVE my doctor. After a long and frustrating labor, once I was far enough along for the nurses to call her, she was so calm and talked me through the delivery...I think I spent maybe 15 minutes pushing. Maybe less. She talked through her reasoning behind her instructions (don't push when it's not the right time, you'll just waste energy!) and she had a very calming nature about her. Plus she honored my birthplan, and for that I was so thankful. I can't say for sure, but with another doctor, I may have ended up with a C-Section since my labor was progressing so slowly after my water broke. Who knows? I'm glad I was able to deliver vaginally.

One side comment that is important to note - I was given a card telling me what to bring for my child. The card said baby clothes, baby bath towel, and diapers. So we brought exactly that - a few onesies, a bath towel, and some diapers & wipes. You also need to bring socks, mittens, hats, and blankets. The hospital has blankets, but they do not have the other stuff. Also, there were plenty of diapers at the hospital - so that card is not super accurate. I remember my anxiety during and after labor when the neonatal nurses were asking my husband "where are the blankets? where are the hats? mittens?" when we weren't instructed to bring any of those things!!! Luckily I had stashed a hat into my delivery bag along with socks - they used the socks on both her hands and feet, and used the towel I brought as a blanket.

Also - the hospital provides adult diapers for post delivery, and they are literally diapers just like a baby would wear, but for grown-ups. They're hard to put on, and they're baggy and saggy and weird - I'd recommend buying a package of Depends or adult diaper briefs that pull on like underwear - I found them to be much more comfortable than what the hospital provided.

Post-Delivery
Here is where the rubber meets the road, and why I 100% recommend Brightpoint, despite any of my complaints. Lacey told me later that she knew things were not quite right because Baby L was covered in more blood than she should have been. My post-delivery was complicated, I hemorrhaged and lost a litre of blood. Again, Dr. Georgeta was cool as a cucumber, and everything turned out just fine.

My post-delivery care was phenomenal. Again, I had some arguments with nurses, and I need to be more vocal about my pain, however overall, in general the nurses are very kind and nurturing.

The pediatric department also took excellent care of my baby. I was able to rest and recover - and while sleeping in a hospital is never fun (vital sign checks all. night. long.), I was thankful for the support.

Since I had an extended stay, I pretty much tried everything on the menu. All the breakfast options were decent. I would avoid the western food options for lunch and dinner and stick with either the Arabic or Asian/Indian options. The western choices were pretty terrible, the others were actually pretty good. The desserts were also pretty bland. I really loved the high fiber cookie that was a snack option (not to be confused with the digestive crackers - those were like cardboard). I never went hungry at the hospital, which is saying something because after my blood transfusion, I wanted to eat all the time.

Pediatrics
I wouldn't say I love the pediatrics department as much as I love the OB/GYN department. The neonatologists and pediatricians are very good, and took excellent care of my baby while she was in the hospital. They also took good care of her after, I just always feel judged by Baby L's doctors when I bring her in for checkups. Maybe it's just me. Either way, I started bringing my husband along, and that judge-y feeling went away.

For more details on my actual birth story, I've written them here - I tried to keep this post fairly focused on reviewing the hospital itself! Thanks for reading!

Birth Story